The Beginner’s Guide for New Moms
If you’re reading this, congratulations on having had your beautiful baby. It’s time to get ready for the next step of parenthood: figuring out how to care for them! You’re a new mom, and you have no idea what you’re doing. Don’t worry, that’s why this blog post is here to help! We’ll take it slow so you can get started on the right foot with your new bundle of joy.
I am a mama to a little boy named Jax and a little girl named Saylor. I wear many hats in life – a personal trainer, real estate agent, boss babe, step-mom, wife and wedding planner. I’ve struggled with depression since I was a teen, and was put on medication at the age of 21 after my younger brother’s death. I never really exercised or paid attention to how I ate. At the age of 25, I had a miscarriage and decided I needed my body to be the epitome of health. I got off the meds, became a personal trainer, and started swapping out chemical products for more non-toxic ones. Five years later, I finally got pregnant again and had my son, all-natural, then three years later had a water birth with my daughter.
This article will offer tips for everything from feeding your baby to getting some sleep when they finally decide to give it up (hint: co-sleeping). If there’s anything we missed in our guide, feel free to let us know in the comments section below. Happy parenting!
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What is new mom life?
People will tell you that life changes when you have a child. It’s more than just not getting any sleep or having to give up sushi when you’re pregnant—it’s more like your whole body and mind change. You’ll be responsible for entirely new person, so prepare yourself for doing things differently than before.
Being a good mom isn’t just giving your child life, or keeping them alive. I mean, yea those are both necessary elements to motherhood, but its also about staying grounded, taking care of ourselves, teaching and uplifting our children without creating dependent, entitled assholes, supporting other moms, and finding the balance in life. I researched everything as a first time mom and I struggled alot – from my kids not sleeping to breastfeeding issues to postpartum depression. Being a mom is HARD work, but so rewarding. Check out more of my pro advice on motherhood here.
Why is this guide for new moms important?
You are going to struggle as a new mom, just like I did, and many others have. The most common struggles as new mamas are lack of sleep, breastfeeding, postpartum depression, anxiety and guilt. What you’re feeling is normal and not a reflection of your parenting skills or abilities. Sorry, there’s no perfect mom checklist!
Many new moms are pushing themselves too hard from the get-go and feeling pressure to do everything “right.” I blame a lot of this unneeded stress on social media. Don’t let what other people are posting about their seemingly perfect lives get to you! Everyone has problems, some are just better at hiding them. Trust me, they didn’t lose all that baby weight by breastfeeding alone.
How to prepare for your new mom life?
Get a support system: It’s hard to ask for help. It’s even harder when you’re doing all the work yourself. Asking for help and build your own support system. Stay in touch with friends and family that are willing to support you during your parenting journey. Try to find some things your enjoy to maintain your sanity while caring for a newborn 24/7.
Setup a bedtime routine and stick to it. It’s good for both baby and mama if you put your baby down for bed at roughly the same time each night. You can read to your child, sing songs, or use a few of our favorite white noise apps to help them fall asleep.
Make sure to eat healthy and drink lots of water. You will need lots of your own energy for the long nights ahead while you try to make tiny human things work. Decide if you are going to be breastfeeding, formula feeding, or a combination of both. Breastfeeding is best if possible! If you can’t, or choose not to, make sure baby gets plenty of healthy formula too.
You’ll need certain necessities like clothes, diapers, wipes but don’t go crazy buying everything under the sun. Half of the things I bought for my kids, they didn’t even use. One thing I wish I had bought for my first born was a swaddle. My second LOVED her swaddle and she slept so much better. Swaddling will comfort most newborns and help you get a lot more sleep. On that note, try to have a full night routine in place for when your baby actually goes to bed. Click here for a list of my favorite baby products and mom gear.
Also you will need to have a bucket of patience: The last thing you need when you’re sleep deprived and covered in weird fluids is someone who’s not on your level of postpartum parenting giving you unsolicited advice and you lose your shit on them. Or when your beautiful little angel that you gave life to is screaming at the top of their lungs and is unconsolable. We all know how it goes, so take a deep breath, walk away, and take a moment to yourself. A good tip if you need a timeout is to hire a babysitter for a few hours or let your partner step in so you can go out with friends or get a pedicure from time to time.
Tips for success as a new mom
- Do your research on important topics regarding your child and choose what is best for YOU and YOUR family. Don’t let others influence what your gut tells you.
- Follow your instincts and stand your ground. If something seems “off”, then it’s probably not a good idea to ignore that feeling. Trusting yourself is important because you know what’s best for your baby.
- By all means, practice gentle parenting. However, kids need guidelines and discipline at times. Handle your shit.
- Stand up for your children and acknowledge their feelings.
- Know when to pick your battles
- Say “yes” when you mean yes, and “no” when you mean no. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Follow through with your words.
- Take time for yourself. Meditate, go for a run, get a pedicure, have a girls’ night… whatever makes you happy and helps you maintain your sanity.
- Understand that we are all human and make mistakes. Learn and grow from them.
- Find a tribe of like-minded women you can relate to. It takes a village.
- Create experiences and memories
- Be open about the fears as a new mom. Don’t downplay your symptoms because you don’t want to seem weak.
- Exercise when you can.
- Remember that it is ok to ask for help!
- and for the love of god, stick to the sleep routine!
Frequently Asked Questions
The last thing you need to know about new mom survival
Knowing that there is no perfect way to be a mom and every child will need different things, you can try new strategies until you find the best one for your family. We all make mistakes when we’re figuring out this parenting thing together – don’t beat yourself up if the strategy doesn’t work! We all want the same thing in this world- happy healthy children. At the end of the day, Momster Strength is about balance: loving yourself, your family, and your life; taking the good with the bad; learning, growing, and teaching.
Share in some of your best new mom fails in the comments below so other moms-to-be know they’re not alone on their journey. And be sure to check us out on Instagram @momsterstrength.
